I’ve been thinking a lot lately about self-trust, and the impact it can have on not only our lives and wellbeing but also the decisions we make. I’ve always said that I’m an indecisive person – I’ve probably said it so much that I’ve convinced myself that that’s just who I am. However, during one of my moments of self-evaluation, I decided I want to become more of a decisive person. So, I Googled “How to become a decisive person” (this is typical for me lool, I Google everything). Which bought me to a few websites that discussed the idea of lack of ‘self-trust’ as one reason for indecisiveness. This was interesting to me as I felt there’s been a number of times when I’ve lacked self-trust.

At this point, I started realising that I wouldn’t be such an indecisive person if I fully trusted myself. It’s like at times I’ve had this continuing distrust for myself or lack of trust that I won’t repeat any past mistakes. So I’d avoid certain situations as opposed to actually being fully confident in my ability to make the right decision this time around. Trusting yourself, your gut and the choices you make is important. Lack of self-trust may stop you from making the moves you need to make in order to get to where you need to be. Or make decisions which can bring you closer to a goal.

I think for a lot of people, me included, it’s the fear of making the wrong decision or repeating past mistakes. The fear that if I make a wrong decision it won’t work out or be beneficial for me. This has led me to feel like I need to reconfirm my decisions with those closest to me beforehand. But if I trusted myself why would I need confirmation from others? I know I have the capability to make any decision on my own. However, the reality is that we all know what we need to do. Our gut speaks to us loud and clear, our mind, body and soul lean towards what we KNOW is best for us and what we FEEL is right. But lack of self-trust causes us to question our natural instincts.

So, I’ve now made a promise to myself that I will trust myself more. I decided to reflect on anytime I went against my gut, got confirmation of someone else and put myself in a bad situation. I also look back on all those times when I made decisions without any confirmation and it ended up being the right one. (Reflection is important btw, always look back on how far you’ve come or any past situation that may be similar to your current situation or dilemma). The point is, we all know what we need to do whether that is to end a relationship/friendship, move out, start a business, change negative habits etc. We all have the power to be decisive, to do what is right for us and our wellbeing. Without having to seek confirmation first or constantly question ourselves. Trust yourself and give yourself more credit. Seek that confirmation from within. You can do exactly what you want, self-trust and decisiveness are the stepping stones to success.

Although, whilst It can be beneficial to reconfirm your decisions or seek advice from others, ultimately it is important to recognise that lack of self-trust is seeking confirmation and wanting others to basically decide what’s best for you. When that’s your job, especially when you have everything in you to do so. The confidence, strength, assertiveness and decisiveness are all within. You have to be willing to use those attributes, ignore the fear and let go of regrets or any bad decisions made in the past.

Thank you for reading.