
We all worry about things and that’s perfectly normal but it’s when it becomes extreme and takes over your happiness is when worrying becomes a major problem.
The end of 2017 I decided to take steps to ease my worrying and my anxiety because it began to take over my life more dramatically. I couldn’t be bothered to socialise or do what I used to enjoy doing. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was finding ways to distract myself (by doing things I probably wouldn’t normally do) from my extreme anxiety and overthinking that it was causing more anxiety… lol, the irony. I would distract myself and then as soon as I’m alone again I’d overthink with irrational thoughts to the point where I’d make myself physically sick. It took away my happiness I swear I could only be happy for a short time period then I’d just have to find something to worry about, I’d have to obsess over something, anything. If it isn’t my health, its other people, the future or just life in general. I want to be genuinely happy, at least in that moment when I do feel happy and not purposely find something to get stressed over which clouds my happiness.
But, I did some things differently last year because for those of us who suffer from anxiety, depression and low moods you know your mind convinces you to stay in, be unsociable, keep your thoughts to yourself and isolate yourself from everyone which I did do from time to time especially when my anxiety was really bad but here and there I would go out even if my mind told me to stay in, overthink and be miserable. Going out made me feel better. I got some fresh air, I spoke to my closest family and friends about what I was going through, went to social events and all of that helped, it made me feel better and even if it was just for a short period of time it was better than isolating myself.
When my anxiety reached its peak late 2017 I knew it was time to take some action. I was constantly having panic attacks, overthinking, crying and feeling hopeless. That’s when I knew I needed to get up and get my mind right. Now I’ve always believed I was a strong-minded person, to be honest, I’ll give myself credit I am a strong-minded person but even for people who are strong like myself we all have our breaking points, we all get to that point in life where we just cannot anymore. You should never be ashamed of getting to that place, sometimes reaching rock bottom can be an opportunity for you to find yourself, become stronger and get back up again…but I got to that place, and I just wanted to be me again.
At that point, I decided to take steps to change and deal with my anxiety. I spoke to my doctor who gave me various numbers to call, and I arranged to speak to someone who could get me into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Now, I don’t know much about it enough to go into detail but I do know CBT is beneficial in tackling root causes of anxiety and negative thoughts and finding solutions on how to overcome that.
Ultimately, life is about making moves to be a better you. I can say it does feel refreshing that I am starting to deal with my anxiety and negative thoughts. I’m trying to be the best possible version of myself that I can be. The weight I’ve carried on my shoulders for years now has been extremely overwhelming and tiring. For anyone dealing with anxiety, depression or low moods I will stress the importance of trying to find help. There are other options I’d suggest like keeping proactive, finding a hobby, reading, writing, gym, meditating or breathing exercises which are all good especially when you’re beginning to feel anxious. Do whatever method that works for you to help alleviate your anxiety (things that are conducive to your wellbeing). Also don’t be afraid to talk about what you’re going through. I am still dealing with my anxiety but I will write more about my journey and more coping mechanisms over time.
And even when you feel alone, remember you’re not alone. You should never feel ashamed of feeling the way you do. You’re human.
Thank you for reading!
Leave a reply to Sariah Cancel reply